Jim Collison:
[0:00] Welcome to Season 4 of The CliftonStrengths Podcast, where we'll dive deep into how CliftonStrengths themes build powerful partnerships and help teams thrive. I'm Jim Collison, Gallup's CliftonStrengths Community Manager.
Jillian White:
[0:10] And I'm Jillian White, Gallup's Subject Matter Expert on Culture and Leadership and our Lead Subject Matter Expert for CliftonStrengths.
Jim Collison:
[0:16] Today's theme is Relator. We'll explore what that theme brings, what it needs and how it fosters collaboration. And as always, Jillian, welcome.
Jillian White:
[0:23] Thank you, Jim. Excited to get into this strength.
Jim Collison:
[0:26] Let's get started. Let's go backwards a little bit, though. What is it? It's not a realtor.
Jillian White:
[0:31] It's not a realtor.
Jim Collison:
[0:33] What is it?
Jillian White:
[0:34] We do often get people that, when they first see this strength, that they do say, Oh, I'm a realtor. It's Relator. But at the heart of this strength is really people that value close relationships with other people. They get satisfaction out of working hard with friends to achieve a goal. It is in the Relationship Building domain. When I think of people who have that strong Relator, and Jim, I know you've got it in your top 10 … these are typically people that value transparency and they value relational depth. They oftentimes like to peel the onion back a little bit at a time with people and be able to go deep over time. I was trying to think of images that would work to represent the strength, and we crowdsourced a few with some of our live audience on here and got some ideas like a wedding ring or, you know, something I think of almost like a maid of honor or a groom, your best man at a wedding, where there's something that represents loyalty, commitment and long-lasting friendship with that social depth of Relator. And fun to get to see that in action. Another one that I saw, if it does help just give something even outside of that relational picture, is just even a tree with deep roots that intertwines with the roots of another tree. And so think about just that concept, that social depth that comes with Relator. It's not about social breadth. It's about social depth. It's oftentimes fewer and a slow burn over time that creates those deep, long-lasting relationships
Jim Collison:
[2:05] I hadn't thought of this example until you just said this, but out front, I have two rose bushes. We've had them out there a long time. They're pretty far apart. I mean, they're a couple feet from each other. But just this year, the left one started also growing roses from the one next to it, right? And so, the roots have come over and somehow come up through the other plants, and they've kind of merged. And so, we have two different colored roses coming out of the same rose bush, which is amazing. So, you think about that deep relationship, that intertwining, when you're talking about roots, that intertwining of roots in there. And those two have really come together. Are they the same plant? No, they're still distinctly different. But they're growing together. And so, I don't know, that's just, as we were thinking about the image of that, that's just what came to mind when you said that. From your consulting work that you've done, what, you've got a great example for me of this?
Jillian White:
[3:03] Yeah, you know, Jim, I was thinking about this. I've worked with a lot of teams that have strong Relators, so what I share may be a little of a composite picture of that. I think one that I can think of that was a leader in healthcare who led with this, and his team had it very high as well. What I saw in how this leader showed up was their ability to just have such genuineness and transparency in leading their teams. And they also built very high trust with their team members. I think some of that was because of what they did publicly with the team. But I always talk about this with any leader that has high Relator. This leader really protected one-on-ones with their team. And oftentimes what they did in those one-on-ones is, it started on a personal note, and it then evolved into focusing on the work. So, it might be the first five or 10 minutes where really just, hey, how are you doing, right? Checking in on the person and then really moving into the work piece. And I always like to bring in our connection to some of our engagement research. And we know that one of the drivers of a high-performing team is that team members can say, my manager or someone at work seems to care about me as a person. And when I look at how that healthcare leader led his team, that item was incredibly high for them. And I think that was a ripple effect of that transparency, that genuineness, that care through those one-on-one relationships that showed up in a powerful way. On the flip side of this, I will give a just potential “watch out” that I've also seen. I can think of another team that I worked with that had very high Relator. And in its best form on a leadership team, this is people very connected to one another and close, committed partnerships. But on this team, it was actually something that was causing them some problems. They had high Relator and Responsibility. And what happened is you almost got some sub-cliques on the team that created silos and kept them from really feeling unified as a leadership team. So, I've also seen some teams with that high Relator have to really work through “How do we think about being intentional with where we're building those relationships so that it doesn't cause unintended factions on a team?”
Jim Collison:
[5:18] Well, those friendships can move outside of the org, and then the negativity can foster, right, in that. So, what a great example of that. We have a new section of Gallup Access in our strengths dashboard called the, well, used to be called the Community tab, Connections now, where you can share your themes with others. And really, this, the fun part about this is to begin to kind of see, hey, as we look at you and you look at me and we're doing these things together, we have some tools in there about what it brings and what it needs. This is kind of supposed to be a shared exercise. We're going to practice that a little bit as we think about Relator. Jillian, what does Relator bring?
Jillian White:
[5:57] Yeah, I think Relator brings social depth. You've heard me say that a few times. Transparency, genuineness, and it loves to work hard with others to achieve goals. Let's break those down just a little bit. I was thinking of just a fun personal story on that social depth piece. And, you know, this might be the flip side of Relator, is sometimes it's hard to get in right away with a Relator because there is a, I always think if Woo is like a match being lit, you know, then Relator is almost like a slow burn on a candle. And it's, it's a little of that patient, peel back the layers over time. And I was, actually, I've got Woo in my top 10. And I was partnered with someone who's a great work friend for me. But it was our first week co-leading a weeklong certification course together. And I remember reflecting with her back on when I thought we became friends. And I said, “Hey, you know what, remember when we became friends like day one of the course, right” Jillian, we weren't friends until Friday.” And that high Relator is that social depth and maybe a little even choosiness of kind of who you're letting in that deep. And kind of you need that patience to really burn the candle slow and build that trust over time. So I think that's a picture of social depth. Transparency, like I said, is what they bring in that partnership. Very genuine, authentic approaches tend to be a little more informal in how they approach things. And then typically love working hard with those great partnerships. And you see a lot of loyalty that can come with that high Relator as well, where they've built that social depth.
Jim Collison:
[7:33] Let's talk a little bit about what does it need?
Jillian White:
[7:35] Yeah. You heard this in my example that I shared, but I think Relators need one-on-ones. And those one-on-ones need to include not just the work, but a focus on the person. So, if I'm partnering with a high Relator, I try to make sure we get some regular one-on-one time together. They need opportunities to form deeper relationships. So even if I'm managing a team, we'll talk a little bit more about this later, but with somebody who has high Relator, I want to, I want to make sure that they're getting opportunities to partner with somebody who they really enjoy working with. They're going to get a lot of satisfaction out of that. And then I think you've heard me reference this hypothesis, but I always think that what a strength values in bringing to other people, it often wants itself. And so, if Relator values that genuineness, that transparency, that ability to peel back the onion and to build trust over time, they need that from who they're partnering with. So, they need somebody to be willing to be a little vulnerable and to share some things that help the depth of that relationship.
Jim Collison:
[8:40] I love, in my role, I get this opportunity — you know, Woo two or Relator nine — I get this opportunity on Woo to join these GGSC courses and 15 minutes of, hey, we're excited for you and post, post-course. But during the day, there are times I need to get out of my office and just go talk to some people and spend some time with one-on-one. And this is, I loved your, I need this one-on-one time with people as well. I think some folks just think that's all I do all day. And I'm like, no, I also need these relationships just one-on-one with people. This is an example of it, this podcast with you and I, I mean, we spend some time before the program talking about it. And I need, as a Relator, I need that time, this one-on-one time. So Relators, make sure you're getting that, forcing it in some way, because I think it's super important. And it's the fuel. Yeah, like I said, yes, I love the crowd influencing things. But there's a, what really gets, you know, gets the fuel or gets the fire burning is these one-on-one times for me as well. So don't miss those. In the new CliftonStrengths report, we have an area now called Theme Dynamics. Really, what does it look like when you take two themes and put them together? It's a great exercise. been very, very popular. Themes have a tendency to kind of group up when we think, when we think about this theme, when we think about Relator. What's it most commonly paired with?
Jillian White:
[10:01] Relator is most commonly paired with Responsibility. I love even just thinking about that commitment and loyalty of the social depth that does come with the inner circle of that Relator, right? They don't need a wide group of close friendships, but it is oftentimes high Relators who I meet have that friendship that maybe spans from junior high or high school or early years in their life where that trust has really been built over time. I think when you add Responsibility to that mix, it just intensifies that loyalty and commitment to one another, and it adds a little of a service element to it. So, you probably really enjoy building trust with your closest partners through how you serve them, and you probably build relationships through serving together. And these are oftentimes people inside of organizations who I find have a high loyalty to their closest partners.
Jim Collison:
[10:57] So we think of this idea of Theme Dynamics and in partnership and collaboration. What could that look like?
Jillian White:
[11:04] Yeah. If you have strong Relator, I always think, what's going to just pair with that in a way that's really enjoyable and lights it up? You love taking those relationships deeper, not with everybody, but those kind of select relationships. I think something like Individualization, Empathy, Connectedness could just help move that to an even deeper place a little faster with people. I think something like Learner or Input could help ask questions that go deeper. So partnering with somebody who has those could be really enjoyable and further that Relator. I also think you could think about partnering with a theme like Maximizer that helps you get the best out of your partnerships. And then finally, I would say partnering with people. Remember, there's an element of Relator that loves working hard with close friends, right? But really helping bring out that productivity element of Relator, pairing it with something like Achiever or Arranger that's thinking about how to take those relationships and make them work for us could bring that productive element to it. And then on the flip side, I always like to talk about who are those complementary partners. And Jim, in just a minute, I'm going to have to ask you about this because I always think of Relator by itself. We always like to think Relator versus Woo because they don't tend to be ones that show up together. They do, as in you have them in your top 10. But we always kind of use these as somewhat contrasting themes. It doesn't mean they're opposites. But I always think if a Woo and a Relator went to a cocktail party, what would that look like, right? You know, the Woo is likely getting a lot of energy from working the room. The Relator, it's going to be a good night when they find someone familiar and get to have one deep conversation with that person, right? So I think the danger of Relator by itself is that it only focuses on that one person. And it's not always thinking about bringing everyone else with it. Same things that you saw with either the silo or the factions, you know, and some of that leadership team. So partnering intentionally with somebody like a Woo or an Includer that says, hey, you know what, let's bring everyone else with us. Let's make the circle wider. That can help that Relator also bring that social breadth to it. And then I think, finally, helping it remember to not just default to certain partners. Things like Harmony or Consistency that might say, Hey, what's the common goal between everyone? Or Consistency that says, Let's make sure there's some fairness. We're not just defaulting to the same partners all the time. Those could help balance out that Relator as well.
Jim Collison:
[13:41] Yeah. No, I love that. And in working in groups, I'll go into a room, size it up. Work some things, and then find some people, and then quickly go, go. At the same time, the Includer, I love your bringing Includer in, because I need them to say, Jim, I need to make sure you're moving all around the room, or however that, however that needs to work. So, love that as well. We have some tips for leaders, teams and individuals. Let's start with leaders. How can leaders recognize and harness this for their teams and for their organization?
Jillian White:
[14:13] Yeah, first of all, you're a leader. Just think about how to start to spot this on your team. You know, these are likely your people who, they might not be the fast relationships, but they're the ones who start to build some really close partnerships with people around them. I would say if you're leading somebody with that high Relator, protect your one-on-one time. You heard me say that earlier, but protect your one-on-one time. Be transparent, even be a little extra vulnerable because that will help them feel a little more connected and build trust. Give time to build the relationship. It is going to be a little of that slow burn, like a candle. Share a little about yourself. That will help progress that connection forward. And then I would ask them, who do you like to partner with and intentionally build in a relationship in their work? Because you even used these words earlier, Jim, it is fuel to a leader. And I think, you know, once again, when we connect a strengths-based approach with engagement, you're six times more likely to be engaged if you feel like you're playing to your strengths. I think the magic of what a leader does when they know the strengths of people on their team is they know or they learn what is going to truly help this person feel engaged and bring out the best of them on a team. And for a Relator, that is making sure they've got that fuel of their close relationships and their work.
Jim Collison:
[15:35] When we think about a team working with or maybe even onboarding someone with high Relator, what kind of things should they be thinking about?
Jillian White:
[15:42] Yeah, once again, you know, just go back to that, that idea of giving them fuel on the first day, if you're onboarding that high Relator, I would think about something like giving them a mentor or a buddy on the first day. So, you know, the high Relator is not necessarily going to want, like, the office party where you meet everybody. But I think having like one-on-one, you know, someone who they get to have that connection with, could be really helpful as a part of their onboarding. And then I would encourage them to leverage their ability to really thrive in that one-on-one environment and use that as a part of their onboarding. So, who do they need to learn from? Who do they need to set up a one-on-one with? That's going to be a good structure for helping them feel more connected to the team.
Jim Collison:
[16:27] Part of the onboarding philosophy used to be called a scavenger hunt. And you would pick people, like, you'd pick people to meet with one-on-one and then schedule those times. And, and sometimes they were directed and sometimes they weren't. It was a great opportunity to get some one-on-one time with people. So maybe a great way to allow that structure to happen. Here might be a list of folks that you want to connect with or on the team. Here's why you might want to connect some, some ideas there. What would a Relator keep in mind for partnerships as we think about the individual?
Jillian White:
[16:56] I love that word that you gave us, Jim, of fuel. So, I would encourage if you have high Relator, just remember that time with your closest partners is fuel for you. So, protect it and seek it. Protect one-on-one time with the people that matter the most to you or the people who it's most important for you to have close partnerships with in your workplace. And then I would just encourage, because you do build that trust and care, just make sure you take opportunities to verbalize that and communicate that, because that can be really meaningful to even furthering those great partnerships that you have the gift of bringing to people around you.
Jim Collison:
[17:36] I think with that, we'll remind everyone to take full advantage of all the learning opportunities we have in Gallup Access. If you need to refuel yourself in this, get in there, log in, Resources tab up or left, and put in Relator. And all our resources will come back on that for you. We've got about seven hours on this theme alone of learning for you. We'd love to have you dig into that as well. And continue to go out and make relationships. And we appreciate that as well. So, for those of you who are joining us live, stay around for a little bit of a post-show. If you're listening to us in a podcast or on YouTube, you should probably click Next. It's probably another one right there for you. With that, we'll say goodbye, everybody.
Jillian White's Top 5 CliftonStrengths are Achiever, Input, Learner, Belief and Responsibility.